I was released from Loughan House today and got Tommy Cajones to pick me up. The first thing i did was down a four pack of Bulmers the good man had brought. After arriving back in Booterstown I hit my bed, and am after waking up.

I see that some people have attempted to take up arms in my name while I was gone. I’ll be frank here. You don’t know me. You know I got thrown in prison, and that I did it while being rather unjustly charged with assault, but do you know that the Court managed to, while I was in the clink – dig up seven other charges of assault upon which I am now going to be tried for in the future? I’ll bet you didn’t. I’ll be looking at six months, and to be fair, these were all my own doing. I hit those bouncers out of my aggression. I can’t defend myself and if they do go before court, I’ll plead guilty.

However, I plan on perhaps skipping the country before then. The question is, to where? The Steiners and Ryans have tendrils across the world, from America to Australia, to Peru and Germany. I can speak French, German, English, irish (loads of use there), but no Spanish … perhaps a sojourn in Berlin would be good.

How was prison? I’ll not say much, but it gave me time to reflect. I thank the inmates for not trying funny stuff with the soap, to my next-door-cellmate Screwball for being aq funny fucker and singing the Fields of Athenry backwards to piss off Munster fans and nearly causing a riot because of it (Leinster uber alles)  and of course the Irish judicial system for putting me there ab initio. Couldn’t have done it without you, boys.

And to conclude: Fuck you muthafuckaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaas!